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The Glade Lady's Web of Lies

There is a commercial that drives me insane. I have held my tongue on the blog because I didn't want to seem like a maniac, but now there's a second commercial.

In the first commercial, a woman dressed in a black cocktail dress and pearls is preparing to have some people over. She prepares her home and lights a Glade candle, but she takes the label off of the Glade candle before her guests arrive. She attempts to throw the label in the garbage, but unbeknownst to her, it attaches to her butt.

Her guests arrive - three other ladies dressed much more casually than their hostess - and they comment positively on the smell of her home.

The Glade Lady claims that the candle came from France.

Her "friends" laugh and one of them snatches the Glade label from her butt. She says mockingly, "Oh, haven't you ever heard of Gladé?"

Then the women laugh at the Glade Lady.

I can't stand this commercial for the following reasons:
  • The Glade Lady is wearing pearls to have some friends over for pie
  • I don't believe that France has this awesome candle-making reputation
  • If they did, it wouldn't be for making Apple-Cinnamon-scented candles
  • The friends never believed that the candle came from France which means that Glade candles are no competition for even the imaginary French candle industry
  • If one really wanted to fool one's friends into thinking that their Glade candle was specially imported from Europe, and especially France, a home-spun scent like Apple Cinnamon is the last scent to choose! I mean, really. Vanilla? Berry? Human Urine? Those scream Paris!
  • What kind of person lies about a candle?
I could have let it go, but the Glade Lady's back in a new commercial.

In this one her husband leaves her alone all day so she can clean her house. Instead she sprays some Glade brand Febreeze rip off on all of her stuff and goes shopping and dancing and ice skating and some other nonsense.

She sneaks back home before her husband returns and pretends to be so tired from cleaning. Her husband finds the Glade product and calls her on her lie.

I don't know why her husband left all day and expected her to clean the house. I don't know what keeps him so busy, but it doesn't seem to be pretending to clean. He may be pretending to go to work, but we'll have to wait for a third Glade commercial to find out.

I also don't know why the Glade Lady is such a bad liar, nor do I know why she decides to lie about the things she does. Maybe she pretends to be a bad liar about these minor things so that when she lies about important things, people think "Well, she must be telling the truth. She is a terrible liar. Remember when she said that candle came from France?"

I'm on to you Glade Lady. Now, please go away.

Related Posts:

That Glade Commercial Madness
Dory Kelly - The Glade Lady
The Glade Lady Crosses a Line
The Glade Lady - Hot or Idiotic?

Comments for this entry

Matthew

Wow, I'm with ya! After seeing the candle commercial and now, the second commercial, I KNEW that there were others that disapproved as much as I did. The whole lying bit, what does that tell you about the people running the company?

Matt- Dallas, Tx

Ness Kinney

Third Commerical mock-up. Fade to Mrs. Liar Liar Pant's on Fire coming home, only to enter a house filled with casually dressed friends, a husband who will not look her in the eye and an intervention specialist. They are all there to confront her about her meth habit. She claims that she has no such habit and that if she did her breath would smell bad and her teeth would be falling out. Then we see her husband pull out a an empty bag. The bag says "Glade Meth-Head Cover Up Kit". We end scene with Mrs. Pant's on fire throwing her hands up and smiling while one of her fake Glade teeth fall out.

Anonymous

I'll agree that the commecial is annoying, but I'll also admit that I think the woman in the commercial is HOT...That said, I'd volunteer for the next commercial if I can play the part of the pool boy who comes over to clean the pool and then has an all day affair with her while the Glade plug-ins work their magic. Now that would be a funny commercial and she'd have good reason to lie when hubby arrives home. : )

Paul

I'm finding this series of commercials borderline offensive, given it makes light of compulsive liars like Casey Anthony. I'm sorry but I don't find compulsive liars funny right now. There's a new one that talks about "pluging-in to her Karma" which seems appropriate. Rot in Hell compulsive lying Glade Lady, and hand Casey an apple-scented candle to put in her car on your way down.

Seena

And there is the one now that she is in the tub and a friend calls her. She says she is a the spa where they have some candles that fill the who room with scent. Her husband knocks on the door, say, "Honey?", her friend says that it was her aromatherapist and hangs up.
Why do you need to lie about that and make up a story about how this fantastic spa has these awesome candles??
If they are so great, share it with your friends! Tell them where you got them so they can enjoy it too!
It irritated me because I thought, how could Glade think that lying to your friends to try to make yourself look better about anything is a good thing.
After seeing them, I could not let it go either. thanks for the blog post.

Anonymous

There is a 4th one. Her and her friends are stretching and doing yoga or some sort, and her friends comment on the scent, she says "Yeah, it really help's me plug into my karma" and her friend notices the Glade Plug-In, and she goes "More like Glade Plug-In" and the lieing woman's posse does that evil laugh.

marrie

I can't believe I'm not the only one, I just did a whole blog post about these annoying commercials, and decided to google it for reasons unknown to anyone (including me)and I found this post. I'm annoyed for different reasons, although, the one that pushed me over the edge was the one where she pretends she is at "the spa". All your reasons are valid too, now I'm happy I'm not the only crazy person letting this get to me, and more annoyed for all the reasons you listed. Uh...Thanks!

Anonymous

Well, I guess none of you are going to be buying Glade products anytime soon. All I know is that the woman in the commercial makes me feel funny... you know... down there. I would drink a Glade plug-in if she wanted of to. Hottest woman I have seen in a while.

Anonymous

I normally don't leave comments on personal blogs but I swear this was one of the funniest damn entries I've seen anywhere.

I would drink a plug in for her as well. She is really hot.

te amo

this is the funniest thing i've ever read, especially the bullet points of reasons why you hate the first commercial. hee hee.

Scott

THIS IS A COMMERCIAL. I find them humorous. People that get their panties in a wad over this character's fibs are in serious need of a life.

Anonymous

I am so glad that there are other people who get irate over commercials. Especially the ones for products marketed towards women. Apparently only women buy lysol or shop for refridgerators...

Anonymous

Poor compulsive liar lady. Glade is only aiding and abetting her self destructive habits.

Seriously, what was she going to say before she came up with that Spa story? "I'm at... the tub?" Yay for bad copy! Grammar-trocious!

Anonymous

Hey!
She's hot.

And knows a thing or two
about wicks!

I like that in a woman.

Leave her alone.

billdcat

Anonymous

every time that commercial comes on
i always get so FUCKING ANGRY AT HOW MUCH OF A BITCH THIS WOMAN IS

i mean
-trying to pass as a upper class snob to her closest friends
-Lying to her husband so she can squander her day doing stupid shit.

im surprised this man puts up with her incessant lying, and doesn't just put a hit out on her, if he does, at least glade is doing all the work around that house so she won't be missed too badly

-K

Anonymous

try decaff....it's only a commercial! While you are figuring out her psychological problems, does anyone know who the actress is???? Seems to be the biggest mystery of the internet!!!

Charlie Fields, RKC

Dori Kelly! It looks like she was in some horror movie in the early nineties. Don't bother looking for her on facebook...I tried.

Great post. I am going to be the Glade Lady for Halloween, actually! I'm really excited and hope people get it!

Anonymous

yeah 'plug into my karma'. OUCH! it makes me want to put my hands in my pockets and fall face first onto concrete until all my teeth are gone. there used to be one for swiffer where the housewife would clean everything in her house with these insane expressions on her face. you know which one freakin destroys my day is the one for those crappy canned soups where the blindfolded woman identifies the ingredients 'spinach from a south facing slope, carrots from the peterson jacobs farms i believe, sea salt, northern waters if i'm not mistaken'. Holy christ!

Anonymous

it is a commercial. get over it. I am sure there are more pressing matters in the world. try fixing one of them. at least she is working and your tax dollars are not keeping her.

www.shevet.org

I think "Anonymous" must be the woman from the commercial - mad at the world for calling her on her lies!! and lying even more now, ashamed of what she has done, lashing out at anyone who dare criticize her decisions...

Anonymous

This is an embarassment from supposed adults. To spend this much time giving a damn about a COMMERCIAL--you ALL are spending too much of your valuable life on a computer, and too much time caring about things that arent even real. Go talk to your children instead of this.

Anonymous

Um...you saw fit to comment on such a meaningless thing that "isn't real", so what does that say about you and how you spend your time? Go talk to YOUR kids if you're such a big believer.

Anonymous

So very very hot. This red-head is on FIRE. Keep the Glade commercials coming....

Dan The Man

TOUCHE!!!!!!!!!!! I thought I was the only one who thought this way, BUT THANK YOU!! I refer to her as the "Lying Sack of S*IT!" LMFAO!! Very nice...

Anonymous

I think we watch to much TV!

Anonymous

I like the Glade lady better as Flo from Progressive Insurance. Flo never lies

newyorker69

i think that everyone that is so obsessed with hating this commericial just has abosolutly NOTHING better do to with their time. fyi get a life!
- New Yorker =)

Coralene

The anonymous comments in this post are so funny!

I read this entry awhile ago and loved it so much that I actually had to find it again today. Next you need to do one about the Progressive Insurance lady. MADDENING!

rdmeeker

But, Coralene, I like the Progressive Insurance Lady.

I mean, they can stop showing her; it's enough.

But, I have no beef.

diane

Have you seen recent comercials? Mrs.Glady Lady is a liar no longer. Kinda bummer if you ask me. You can check it out on YouTube.

rdmeeker

I totally agree, Diane. At least she was interesting as a liar.

annulla

Gee, I thought I was the only one who was annoyed by the compulsive liar starring in those commercials. Although Glade hasn't made her go away completely, at least they aren't showing her constantly lying anymore. That's one step in the right direction.

rdmeeker

I mostly agree, annulla, but don't you think she's boring now? Before she was at least engaging. Now she's just blah.

Anonymous

I so agree with everyone on the nauseating Glade lady and her candles. She reminds me of my sister, (a born again Christian who lies about just about everything and thinks she is just the cutest thing). She is also a phony. I hate these commercials so much that I won't even buy the product. I would love to find a website with her commercial on it. I have another relative who has never seen it and would love to see the similarities of my sister and the Glade lady.

Anonymous

Get a grip pimples...it's satire...a parody...it's to make people talk and it is obviously working...

Anonymous

Dori Kelly is just as phony and nauseating in real life. She lives in NJ and is pushy overbearing and cliquish.

Mr64

Cut the glade lady a break and let her peddle her candles or the next thing you'll be a smellin is her crack!

Anonymous

I don't care if the commercial is stupid, which, admittedly it is. But this woman Dori Kelly(?) is so hot that I want to do her instantly every time I see her on TV. I don't care if the commercials are stupid, if people report that she is a bitch, etc. etc. She is enjoyable because she is so fuckable!!!

John

Gheez RDMEEKER Get over it You dang Cry Baby boo hoooohooooo n Wah Wah!
You dont like the commercial then Move on and Get a Dang Life.
Have You been to France and do You know what kind of candles the make there????????????/
I guess NOT! You dont like the commercial then dont watch!
You have nothing better than to CRY
I feel Sorry for You CryBaby

Anonymous

John,
Who put the stick up your butt????? It's a joke, a little comic relief...get over yourself!!

Anonymous

John,
Who put the stick up your butt???? Ever heard of satire, joking, or comic relief????? Get over yourself!!

Bill Jackson

I don't care about any of this crap, I just want to have sex with her.

Anonymous

well i guess the commecial did what it's suppose to do get your attention so did it

Anonymous

Yeah and she has a seriously sweet rack!

Stapleton Denver

yep, I also agree she was very interesting as a liar! lol....

Anonymous

How does her husband put up with her lies?

He spanks her.

Hard.

You know she loves it. That's why she's such a dirty little liar.

 

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