Iran vs. a Fly

Guess which one gets more coverage from the US media?

I've been following the post-election situation in Iran on Twitter and some other online sources and it's amazing how little is actually known about the situation on the ground.

According to ADN Kronos (an Italian news agency that focusses on the Middle East to which I've linked many times before), two prominent Iranian artists presented documentation purporting to prove that Ahmadinejad came in third in the elections.

According to the Guardian, the man who provided them with that document was killed in a suspicious car accident a couple of days ago. (scroll down to 11am update)

And then, there's this from someone called NiteOwl.

15. Several eye-witnesses have seen non-Iranian Arabs waving
Hamas/Hezbollah flags around the protests. These reports have been fully
confirmed and are NOT a rumor spread by Israel.
(Read the whole thing here.)

I don't know how true any of this is, but it certainly all seems well within the bounds of reason. I'm just passing it along.

Oh, and Jalal Talabani became only the second head of state to acknowledge Ahmadinejad's "victory" and to congradulate him. Very disappointing Mam Jalal, very disappointing.

About the Bailout

You must read this article.

I am not a fan of Rolling Stone's political pieces, but this article is the most informative one I've read about the collapse of AIG and what it means for the financial system.

It's eight pages, but I recommend reading it through.

The mistake most people make in looking at the financial crisis is thinking of it in terms of money, a habit that might lead you to look at the unfolding mess as a huge bonus-killing downer for the Wall Street class. But if you look at it in purely Machiavellian terms, what you see is a colossal power grab that threatens to turn the federal government into a kind of giant Enron — a huge, impenetrable black box filled with self-dealing insiders whose scheme is the securing of individual profits at the expense of an ocean of unwitting involuntary shareholders, previously known as taxpayers.

I should not that it's not for sensitive eyes; Rolling Stone is 'edgy' and we all know 'edgy' means fowl language.

Boycott Donato's

I ordered a pizza last week from Donato's online. I ordered one of their online specials and entered the code.

When the pizza arrived, we paid and the driver left. But then he came back.

"I need the coupon," he said.

"It was an online special. There is no coupon," I said.

"If you don't have the coupon, you have to pay the full price," he said.

That wasn't going to happen and I told him so. He called his manager and she said that I needed to pay the difference or give the driver the coupon. I told him I'd need to talk to the manager myself.

I called Sarah and we discussed the matter. She told me that Donato's is cracking down on coupons and that, if they don't turn in the paper coupons, then corporate won't honor the discount and someone has to pay for it.

I explained that I had used online coupons before without incident and that it didn't make sense that I would be responsible to validate an online special from their own website. She told me that's just how it is.

She asked me to print the coupon. I refused. I didn't have any ink, but I told her there was no way I'd print it under any circumstances.

Sarah told me she'd let it side this time, but next time...

I told her not to worry about the next time; there wouldn't be one.

Here's why:

When the customer fails to turn in a coupon, Donato's corporate won't honor the coupon. They take the money from the DRIVER.

The driver. Of all the links in the chain the driver is the one who pays the price.

Not to put it lightly, but I don't like that policy. I don't want to do business with a company like that. There are too many other (better) pizza companies that don't screw their drivers.

Don't Trust Your Sister

Mine told me a bogus story!

In her defense, she was fooled by someone else.

The Le-a story is a fraud. I said it seemed like an urban legend and it is.

Click here to read the account on Snopes.com.

It's too bad, though. I really liked that story.

The Idiotic-Hot Scale

A blogger I don't know has posted about the Glade Lady and asks the question, Is the Glade Lady hot or idiotic?

I don't think the choice is so clear. It's not dualistic, it's multidimensional. There are innumerable points along the scales hot and idiotic. The Glade Lady could be both or even neither. I would suggest a graph such as the one below to answer the question.
We could argue where the Glade Lady actually lies on this chart, but I don't think she's as hot as most of my readers do.

Nothing against Dori Kelley.

Related Posts:

The Glade Lady's Web of Lies
That Glade Commercial Madness
Dori Kelly - The Glade lady
The Glade Lady Crosses a Line

The Glade Lady Crosses a Line

I am not obsessed with the Glade Lady.

I swear.

But there's a new commercial and I feel I must comment on it. You see, this time the Glade Lady takes her foolishness too far.

The Commercial:

The Glade Lady can be seen lighting a candle (I guess it's not really a candle at all, but some sort of Glade oil scent pod. I don't know the trade name, but it's not important) and then putting out some store-bought gingerbread cookies.

She invites her friends in and they comment on how good her cookies smell.

One of the cookies stands up - seriously - and says "Oh no you didn't. That smell is a candle, not us cookies!"

The friends are probably all "What the... that cookie just talked," or "Oh how magical! A talking cookie. It's like a Disney film. Or Shrek. Or Shrek 2. Or even Shrek 3"

The Glade Lady doesn't miss a beat. She grabs the cookie and bites his head off as her friends look on horrified. She then offers the remaining cookies to the friends confident that her warning will keep the other cookies silent.

The Analysis:

I think this one is meant to be a light-hearted take on the Glade Lady's compulsion to lie.

"Ah, gee, she got busted by that cute talking cookie."

The only way to make it light-hearted, though, is for the Glade Lady, the cookie and the friends to have a good laugh.

Instead, she murders the cookie.

Up to this point, those who have been brave enough to confront the Glade Lady have lived to tell about it: her friend who finds the sticker on her butt, her husband, her yoga partner. Now, the Glade Lady has put her detractors on notice: If you cross me, I will bite your head off while your family watches and I will chew it up.

Before you write this off as over analysis, I suggest you watch the commercial and focus on the friends. I think their faces are priceless. They say:

"In two minutes, I just saw a freakin' talking cookie, my friend ate said cookie and then tried to make me eat a similar cookie, a cookie which may be just alive as the first one. I don't know how many of those cookies can talk! Why am I friends with this woman? Why am I still in this kitchen? I am disgusted, but mostly I am afraid! If I make any false moves, will she eat me, too?"

I wonder what's next for the Glade Lady now that she's had a taste of blood.

Or icing.

I don't really know what flows through the veins of gingerbread men.

Related Posts:

The Glade Lady's Web of Lies
That Glade Commercial Madness
Dori Kelly - The Glade lady
The Glade Lady - Hot or Idiotic?

Unemployable?

Two weeks ago, I had an interview. That job was one that I really wanted and I thought the interview went well.

Last week, the hiring manager was out of the office and he told me to call if I hadn't heard anything by the 9th.

So, I called.

He said "That position has been filled...umm...I was just getting ready to call you."

Ugh!

First of all, if you work in HR, just call people. It's easy not to be a jerk.

Secondly, why can't I get hired? This isn't a pity question. I'm serious.

My resume is good, my experience is good, I interview well. It just doesn't make sense to me. I'd hire myself.

I've been considering taking things off of my resume. I've applied to some jobs without my graduate degree and internships. I think those things plus the work in Iraq, hurt me at this last interview.

At the end of it, he said, "Well, after all of the excitement in Iraq and London, this job would probably be pretty boring."

I don't really have a point here, I just wanted to rant a little.

Debate #2: 10:22

Obama says in relation to foreign policy:

"We have to be proactive. We've been reactive for the past 8 years."

That's not a direct quote, but it's close enough. Look it up.

Except in Iraq, of course. Where Bush took the proactive step rather than waiting for Saddam to act. That, of course, was a mistake according to Obama; Iraq posed no direct threat to us.

Am I wrong in thinking this doesn't reconcile? Have I missed something?

Not to mention his comments on Georgia! What he says is misleading. He did not take a hard stand against Russia and gives us no reason to believe he would.

I am trying to be open to Obama, but I do not trust him on foreign policy. I do not like the positions that he holds and I do not believe his policies are workable.

In addition he speaks of energy independence taking petro dollars from the Russians. The problem being that it isn't US consumption driving the Russian oil industry; it's Europe. It's petro Euros. The US got about 1% of our crude oil from Russia in 2007. Energy independence is not the answer to everything.

And the thing that makes me the most skeptical? The talk of intervening in Darfur to end genocide and, in the same breath, denouncing the invasion of Iraq. A country and a regime with a proven history of genocide.

So, what's a voter like me to do? I'm disappointed by McCain's economic policies, but I like Obama's foreign policy even less.

The third party candidates have insane platforms, but I could vote for one of them as a protest vote. A successful third-party candidate could force change in the big two parties.

BUT none of the current third party candidates have the strength of numbers to push such a change.

You don't have to read this. I'm just rambling through my thoughts.

Dori Kelly - The Glade Lady

The Glade Lady is very popular.

I don't know why. I mean, she seems to be a fine actress. The Glade commercials aren't too much to work with, though, so I can't really judge her abilities. I've had a number of comments refering to her "hotness," and, while she does seem to be an attractive lady, I wouldn't call her hot.

No offense, Dori.

I decided to find out more about the actress as a service to my readers. I didn't find much fact. I found many other people asking the same questions.

Someone on YouTube claims to have e-mailed Glade and gotten the actress' name: Dori Kelly.

But that's where the trail ends.

The closest reference I can get is an actress by the name of Dori May Kelly, who starred in a 1991 horror film called Winterbeast. The photo of the actress on that site is much too small for me to tell if it's the same woman.

They do seem to look alike, but I really can't claim it as truth.

Here's the trailer. You be the judge. You can see her at 55 seconds and again at 1:02.

Oh, and beware. The movie is disgusting for no reason.



If it's her, it explains the compulsion to lie. She's been denying her role in that movie for 17 years.

Related Posts:

The Glade Lady's Web of Lies
That Glade Commercial Madness
The Glade Lady Crosses a Line
The Glade Lady - Hot or Idiotic?

That Glade Commercial Madness

I am not the only one who has something to say about the Glade Lady.

Vanessa supplies this comment:

Third Commercial mock-up. Fade to Mrs. Liar Liar Pant's on Fire coming home, only to enter a house filled with casually dressed friends, a husband who will not look her in the eye and an intervention specialist. They are all there to confront her about her meth habit. She claims that she has no such habit and that if she did her breath would smell bad and her teeth would be falling out. Then we see her husband pull out a an empty bag. The bag says "Glade Meth-Head Cover Up Kit". We end scene with Mrs. Pant's on fire throwing her hands up and smiling while one of her fake Glade teeth fall out.

I hate to break it to Vanessa, but there are two additional Glade Lady commercials, so he Meth Lady commercial would be number 5 or so.

I have only seen the newest two once each, so I can't say too much about them, but I can't just let them pass without comment.

In the first, the Glade Lady is doing yoga at home with friends. Someone comments on the great smell of the room. The Glade Lady claims that the scent is the smell of her yoga-induced sweat.

Or something. I have to admit that I wasn't paying attention until I realized the Glad Lady was back and by then I had missed most of it. But I got the point; the Glade Lady was trying to pretend her Glade Scented-Oil Plug In was something other than a Glade Scented-Oil Plug In.

Apparently, Glade Scented-Oil Plug Ins are an embarrassment to their owners. Just like Glade candles.

In the second new commercial, the Glade Lady is taking a bath with a Glade candle beside the tub. She gets a phone call and tells her friend she's at a spa. Her husband comes into the bathroom and interrupts the call. Her friend says "Who was that?" The Glade Lady...lies.

Of course.

Now, again I have to confess that I haven't studied this commercial as much as the original, but I think that the friend calls her on her home phone*.

The other option is that she calls her friend. This option means that she called in order to lie about being at the spa while the first option implies that she thinks her friend is unimaginably dim.

"Yeah, you called my home phone, but I had it forwarded to this spa..."

Who thought these up?

Here are some better Glade-related lies:

1. The Glade Lady claims she bought the Glade candle, but she really stole it.
2. The Glade Lady has a trunkload of stolen Glade candles. When her husband confonts her, she says she won a radio contest.
3. The Glade Lady refills her Glade brand Febreeze rip off spray bottle with generic brand Febreeze rip off spray, but tells her friend it's Glade.
4. The Glade Lady leaves her Glade Scented Oil Plug In plugged in for weeks after the oil is gone. It sets the house on fire. She blames a lightening strike and collects the insurance.
5. The Glade Lady's husband demands that she see a counselor and deal with her compulsion to lie. She pretends to go, but spends the time sniffing Glade Spray at Kroger.

Ok, I think that's enough.

*Ok, I've seen it a few more times and I now know that it's her cell phone. I don't care. It's still ridiculous. I know the spa would have a locker for her belongings and I'm sure that the locker room would have a sign. Please turn off all cell phones before placing them in the locker. This is for the comfort of our guests. Thank you. Management.

Even made up spas with made up aromatherapy have those signs. Get with it Glade Lady.

Aren't you glad I set the record straight?

Don't you mean... Glade?

Related Posts:

The Glade Lady's Web of Lies
Dory Kelly - The Glade Lady
The Glade Lady Crosses a Line
The Glade Lady - Hot or Idiotic?

The Glade Lady's Web of Lies

There is a commercial that drives me insane. I have held my tongue on the blog because I didn't want to seem like a maniac, but now there's a second commercial.

In the first commercial, a woman dressed in a black cocktail dress and pearls is preparing to have some people over. She prepares her home and lights a Glade candle, but she takes the label off of the Glade candle before her guests arrive. She attempts to throw the label in the garbage, but unbeknownst to her, it attaches to her butt.

Her guests arrive - three other ladies dressed much more casually than their hostess - and they comment positively on the smell of her home.

The Glade Lady claims that the candle came from France.

Her "friends" laugh and one of them snatches the Glade label from her butt. She says mockingly, "Oh, haven't you ever heard of Gladé?"

Then the women laugh at the Glade Lady.

I can't stand this commercial for the following reasons:

• The Glade Lady is wearing pearls to have some friends over for pie
• I don't believe that France has this awesome candle-making reputation
• If they did, it wouldn't be for making Apple-Cinnamon-scented candles
• The friends never believed that the candle came from France which means that Glade candles are no competition for even the imaginary French candle industry
• If one really wanted to fool one's friends into thinking that their Glade candle was specially imported from Europe, and especially France, a home-spun scent like Apple Cinnamon is the last scent to choose! I mean, really. Vanilla? Berry? Human Urine? Those scream Paris!
• What kind of person lies about a candle?

I could have let it go, but the Glade Lady's back in a new commercial.

In this one her husband leaves her alone all day so she can clean her house. Instead she sprays some Glade brand Febreeze rip off on all of her stuff and goes shopping and dancing and ice skating and some other nonsense.

She sneaks back home before her husband returns and pretends to be so tired from cleaning. Her husband finds the Glade product and calls her on her lie.

I don't know why her husband left all day and expected her to clean the house. I don't know what keeps him so busy, but it doesn't seem to be pretending to clean. He may be pretending to go to work, but we'll have to wait for a third Glade commercial to find out.

I also don't know why the Glade Lady is such a bad liar, nor do I know why she decides to lie about the things she does. Maybe she pretends to be a bad liar about these minor things so that when she lies about important things, people think "Well, she must be telling the truth. She is a terrible liar. Remember when she said that candle came from France?"

I'm on to you Glade Lady. Now, please go away.

Related Posts:

That Glade Commercial Madness
Dory Kelly - The Glade Lady
The Glade Lady Crosses a Line
The Glade Lady - Hot or Idiotic?